' don't i get to choose my gender/sexual orientation?

tonight I had dinner with a friend of mine who will be 91 shortly and she has always TOLD me that i am not Queer, but perhaps BI. tonight i spoke about my opening up my choices to Gender/Queer Fluid. It will be the "person" that I am attracted to not whether female or male or trans for that matter. I get to choose what is right path for me. I feel i was being boxed into an old hetronormative way of being. You are this you are that.. what about my choice being Sheri Ahava Cohen and I am fluid. I identify as she/ her and I am begining to experience my own life, opening up to new experiences, eventually dating people. I am giving myself time to be and live into creating my own community. i have the capacity and the agency.